I have so many, I don’t even know where to begin, but I will try to go in order.
- I got pulled over for speeding for the first time ever. To be fair, I honestly thought I was in a 45 zone. I was in a 35 zone. To my luck, the cop believed me and let me go with a warning. Nine years of driving and no tickets yet.
- Still, I sped on my way to work because I panicked when the car clock read 7:44 and I thought I would be late. My car clock is an hour off. It was really 6:44. My clock has been off since Daylight Savings and this is probably the first time it has fazed me.
- I’ve always been the queen of making conversations awkward, which is probably why I brought up mammograms while talking to my father.
- While taking notes for linguistics, I wrote down the questions from the powerpoint but did not write down the answers to those questions. This will probably make for awkward office hour interactions later on this week.
- Shampoo has been on my list of things to buy for a few weeks now. I am completely, completely out of it now. I have not washed my hair in four days. Somehow, I forgot to buy shampoo when I went to Target, even though I had a physical copy of my to-buy list with me.
- I spent Valentine’s Day studying and grading at a local Starbucks. I bought myself some coffee. Romantic, I know.
- Almost falling while teaching. While my students were working quietly, I went to my podium at the front of the classroom with the intention of sitting down. While trying to sit down, I missed the chair and ended up stumbling over my feet to try to keep my balance. Either none of my students noticed or they are all too polite to point and laugh at me.
- Forgetting to lock the bathroom door and having a colleague walk in on me in there. I know how to lock doors, I swear. And consequently swallowing my gum from the shock of the door not being closed.
At the end of the day though, it’s nice to know I am not the only one failing. I found this sign in a bathroom on campus. It’s nice to know others need reminders on how to use doors.
Somehow, despite all of my fails, I managed to get 120% on my linguistics quiz.